Desire to be important

Humans are wired to be emotional, but why? This blog focuses on understanding the fundamentals of dealing with people and why it is important.

“We often take our moms and spouses so much for granted that we never let them know we appreciate them."

The deepest urge in human nature is “the desire to be important." Remember that phrase: “the desire to be important." It is significant.

The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.

The desire for a feeling of importance is one of the chief distinguishing differences between mankind and animals. To illustrate: Horse racing is a million-dollar game where the winning horse doesn't care about the medals they had won, but the Jockey(horse-rider) does. These prizes give him a feeling of importance because we humans are tied to emotions. Without it, we should have been just about like animals. It was this desire for a feeling of importance that led an uneducated, poverty-stricken tea seller to climb to the country’s highest rank; Prime Minister of India. And this same desire made the richest family in your city build a house far too large for its requirements. This desire makes you want to wear the latest styles, drive the latest cars, and brag about your achievements in life. If you tell me how you get your feeling of importance, I’ll tell you what you are. That determines your character. That is the most significant thing about you.

Enough Taher! Stop rolling and please come straight to the point. Alright, so what I am trying to convey here is that people are just hungry for a feeling of importance, imagine what miracle you and I can achieve by giving people an honest appreciation. Today, Nikhil Kamath (Zerodha's founder) is the youngest billionaire in India and an inspiration to many. Why? Because Nikhil is a genius? No. Because he knows more about the stocks than other people? Nonsense. Many employees working for him know more about the stocks than he does. He is a self-made billionaire today because of his ability to deal with people. Here is his secret recipe to success. The greatest asset he possesses, and the way to develop the best that is in a person is by appreciation and encouragement. There is nothing else that so kills the ambitions of a person as criticisms from superiors. Never ever criticize anyone!

But what do average people do? The exact opposite. If they don’t like a thing, they bawl out to their subordinates; if they do like it, they say nothing.

Our beautiful moms and wives have been cooking for us and have been taking care of us for many years now, how many times have you actually walked upon them acknowledging their tremendous efforts and expressing your gratitude towards their hard work? It is because of our “lack of appreciation.” We often take our moms and spouses so much for granted that we never let them know we appreciate them.

Once Sakina asked me to help her by listing six things I believed she could do to help her become a better wife. I could have actually listed a thousand things I would like to change about her—but I didn’t. I said to her, ‘Let me think about it and give you an answer in the morning.’

“The next morning I left a note on my work table at home which read: ‘I can’t think of six things I would like to change about you. I love you the way you are.’

“When I arrived at home that evening, who do you think greeted me at the door: That’s right. My wife! She was almost in tears. Needless to say, I was extremely glad I had not criticized her as she had requested. It was then I realized the power of appreciation.”

We often nourish the bodies of our children, but how seldom do we nourish their self-esteem? We provide them with the finest food to build energy, but we neglect to give them kind words of appreciation that would sing in their memories for years like the music of the morning stars.

When we are not engaged in thinking about some definite problem, we usually spend about 95 percent of our time thinking about ourselves. Now, if we stop thinking about ourselves for a while and begin to think of the other person’s good points, that will bring a significant difference in our lives.

One of the most neglected virtues of our daily existence is appreciation, Somehow, we neglect to praise our son or daughter when he or she brings home a good report card, and we fail to encourage our children when they first succeed in tying shoelaces on their own. Nothing pleases children more than this kind of parental interest and approval. The next time you see your children succeed at school, appreciate them for their honest efforts. Hurting people not only do not change them but it also is never called for.

Appreciate, love & respect people, and the world will be yours.

Much love and God bless! 😇